Freedom from your programs 

This is a big one! What would be possible if you did not doubt yourself? 
A large number my clients have listed this as one of the goals they want to achieve and oddly enough this is normally the one thing that prevents you from achieving your goals. 
Before I go into how to get over self-doubt you need to know a little more about it. 

The very good news that nearly every person on the planet has suffered from self-doubt and the only ones not to are psychopaths. The fact that you are interested enough to be reading this is a good indication that you are not a psychopath.☺

So why do you have self-doubt when all it really does is stop you from achieving things that you want to achieve? If you have been following any of my blogs you will have read about the conscious and unconscious minds and how your experience of reality is made up of the combination of these two parts of you. They do not play an equal part though as your unconscious mind contributes at least 95% to how you experience reality and your conscious mind only 5%. Your unconscious mind is very important as it directs and gives the instructions for your heart to beat, your lungs to breathing and maintains all of the bodies functions that it would be impossible for you to run manually.

 It also interprets all of the information coming in from your senses all of the time. It compares them to data it has already collected to assess whether they are dangerous or pleasurable. Anyone who has had young children will know that they don’t automatically know that some things are hot and can burn them. It normally takes one experience for them to develop a program that stops them from touching hot things again. How these programs work is that once they are triggered by the information coming in from your senses such as heat or steam this activates one of your programs which will send thoughts which activate feelings which in turn cause you to respond in a certain way. If you have ever tried to do something you are afraid of you will know how hard it is to act against your feelings and yet all they are -is feelings! For instance I will assume that you have at some point burnt yourself and developed the program to prevent this from happening again. So if you were to decide that you wanted to walk on hot coals (as some people do), the only thing stopping you would be your thoughts and feelings; and believe you me getting past these is tough! This is how powerful your subconscious mind is at controlling your experiences of life. You have 1000’s of these programs that control how you interact with others, how you communicate, whether you are outgoing or introverted, self-confident or not. 

I am telling you all of this because this is where self-doubt comes in. When you experience self-doubt you are doing something that you have either never done before or something that you have not managed to do before. Your subconscious mind accesses its database of everything you have ever experienced and either says “Uh Oh we have no data -this could be a potentially life threatening or humiliating situation let’s put on the brakes and activate the self-doubt” or it will say “Ah Ha the data is not looking good we did this before and it didn’t work. Going on the data it won’t work again. This situation could be problematic lets activate self-doubt.”

I think it is so very important to know that self-doubt is not based on facts it is based on the past or on lack of information and it is something that most of us feel a lot of the time when we are pushing boundaries and growing. 

This is why fear contracts your life because if you give in to self-doubt and fear you will stop pushing the boundaries and your life will become less because of it. However if you choose to see fear and self-doubt for what they are - just programs - you can then choose to live your life to the full. 

But... If you are anything like me you still want to know, HOW to get past self-doubt. You may want a magic pill but unfortunately I can't offer you that. I can however share with you the way I do know - and that is; 

To move past self doubt you need to build up positive information in your subconscious that supports you rather than limits you. The exercise I am going to share with you I use with every single client I have and it is very simple but has to be acted on over and over again to really have impact. 

1. Set yourself challenges that streatch you by at least 20%. You can streatch yourself more than 20% but keep in mind that the more you streatch yourself the more challenging you will find it to keep your word to yourself. 
2. Be in action of keeping your word to yourself. This is the most important part of this exercise is that you keep your word. By keeping your word to yourself you will be telling your subconscious mind that you are someone who is able to overcome challenges. If you don't keep your word to yourself you will be reinforcing the belief that you cannot and your self-doubt will grow. 
3. Keeping your Word 80% of the time. For you to see a noticeable difference in your level of self-doubt you will need to  keep your word around 80% of the time. It is at this level that your subconscious will start to work with you rather than against you. To ensure you manage this I would suggest consciously choosing and setting challenges. Set aside time once a week and write them down. Give yourself a week to complete them and then go back to your paper and check to see to what % you managed to acheive them. Then repeat the exercise by setting some more challenges and checking back in with yourself to see to what % you achieved the. 
   

This little process I have described is why coaching is so very successful, because you are checking in with someone else every week there is more motivation to ensure you keep your word to yourself and before you know it you have turned your life around and cant imagine WHY you were so concerned in the first place! 

I would like to share an example with you. I am dyslexic and as you can imagine writing does not come naturally to me. It has taken me years to get to this place where I can sit down and rattle off an article without putting it off and finding something else to do. I did not find this easy but did keep setting myself challenges and did keep stepping forwards. Now I am fairly confident in my ability to write my thoughts down. I do still make the odd mistake (especially when it comes to punctuation!) but I no longer feel that my life is limited my by dyslexia.  ☺

Wishing you a wonderful week and hoping that you find the freedom that comes from  believing in yourself.

With love
​
 Britt

Success Strategy 

This is a strategy that I came up with around 3 years ago. I love simplicity and finding patterns to create short cuts in life. Having coached 100’s of people I decided to find a strategy that would help anyone with any challenge they were facing and allow them to acheive success. This is what I came up with.
Firstly…

Everything in life is created with the same process; 

                                 Thought   -   Emotion   -  Action
 
You can look around your environment right now. Look at what you are sitting on, what you are holding, wearing and in fact you yourself were created using this process. First your parents thought they would like to connect, they then felt emotions that caused the action of connecting intimately and then 9 months or so later you were born. The seat you are sitting on or the shoes that you are wearing were also created in this manner. Someone had an idea (thought), felt (emotion) it would be a good idea to create it and then created it (action). 

Most things we create in life we do so unconsciously, most of us have not mastered our thoughts and emotions and therefor our actions come from this unconscious space. You only need to look into where you are struggling in your own life to know that you would not have don’t this to yourself consciously. There for you must have created it unconsciously. This strategy will support you in creating consciously so that you can overcome the unconscious thoughts and emotions that can so often derail you and I. 

Strategy 

Know the solution you want 

1. Clearly identify the challenge or the destination, the reality rather than the illusion.
2. Let go of emotional attachment  
3. Create a clear picture of what you would love the outcome to be, the bigger picture. 

Brainstorm possible outcomes 

1. Brainstorm possible courses of action – choose max of 5
2. Look at the worst case scenarios for each choice and what will stand in your way of achieving the desired outcome 
3. Design action steps, checking to ensure you feel excited to complete them and ask what you need to do to support yourself in seeing it through 

Take action 

1. Take action and inspired action - To gain access to a BONUS video Click this link
2. Step into the emotion of having achieved the result 
3. Let go and do clearing statements if necessary 

I have been struggling with my own very intense challenges in the last few months and it has given me the opportunity to trial this strategy first hand. I found that the strategy held firm but that I needed to master a deeper understanding of a few of the steps. Below I have elaborated on one of these subtleties as it pertains to point 8. 

8. Step into the emotion of having achieved the result 
This step is the one I have been focused on the most in the last month. I have realised that it is one of the most important steps if not the most important one. When you try to create from fear or lack you will only create more fear and lack. It is absolutely vital to be able to step into the feelings you wish to have even if you only do it for a few moments each day. There is so much to explain around this that I cant get it all down here. However the below explanation will get you started…

We are brought up to place great value in doing things and whilst doing in incredibly important who we are “Being” whilst we are doing is even more important. The strategy above encourages action and it is important, but for your actions to take you where you want to go you will need to be able to change your state from, lack and fear to, having already achieved it. Let me explain by referencing the example of creation I gave you at the beginning of the blog. 

Most people try to acheive success by following the process of creation in this order; 

1. Action - Emotion - Thought 

1. Decide what success they want to experience 
2. Decide what actions they need to take 
3. Fight with their thoughts and feelings (fear, doubt, uncertainty) or try to ignore them 
4. Get defeated or fight through to success with a lot of effort 

With example 2 the order the process is followed is slightly different; 

2. Thought - Emotion - Action 

1. Decide what success you want to experience 
2. Think how your life will feel and who you will be Being once you have achieved it, keep stepping into this in spite of what is showing up in your life. 
3. All of your ideas for action will come from this place, take action on them without expectation that success needs to come from any particular direction. You will know when you are taking the right action because the action itself will give you joy.  
4. Success is enjoyable and easy because even as you await the inevitable physical manifestation of this success you are already enjoying the experience of it. 

Here is a more visual explanation;

 Example 1 (the one below) Doing Success - Exhausting, defeating, overwhelming, uncertain

























​
​Example 2 (above) Being Success - Joy, ease, fulfilment, certainty,   
 
In example 1, success is somewhere outside of yourself somewhere you need to get to and you need to take the right action to get you there. Your achieving success is dependent on external circumstances and other people allowing you to be successful.  

In example 2, who you are “Being” creates success and all action takes you there, because it is already where you are. Your achieving success is totally dependent on you and no one and nothing else. 

I hope that this will help you to step into a positive and glorious 2018 where the only limitations on your success are due to you not having imagined it yet. 

Best wishes and lots of love 

Britt 

How To Create A Flow Of Abundance 

I have taken time to specifically focus on gratitude, I have joined gratitude groups where we check in and say what we are grateful for, and I have read about how important gratitude is for a consciously aware life - I thought I understood it. However, I didn’t really get it until this morning…

I went out for my usual run/walk/ponder today, I run because it helps me be in my body and connect with all that is around me. It is my time in the day to centre myself and connect with all that is. Somedays it is easier to do this than on other days and today was one of the tricky ones. I really struggled to get out of my head. I have a lot of things going on and a lot to worry about, but I also know that this incessant worrying is not good for me and will not take me where I want to go. I am aware that it is my automated, ego driven, safety mechanism but this was not helping me to step out of it and really enjoy the gorgeous day around me. 

As I turned to come home a little thought popped into my head - that I should take a moment and sit under the big old oak tree, (a particular favourite of mine due to the comfy stones strewn around beneath it). I nearly dismissed it as it was only a very little thought. It was only after a fairly intense conversation in my head debating if I should listen to this little thought - it might not really be anything, was I being reminded to take a moment or was it just preconditioning as I often stop and sit under this gorgeous tree. I really had a lot to do today and getting home earlier would mean more time to do it all in. In the end I decided to honour this little thought and spend a few minutes in contemplation. 

As I sat beneath the lovely old tree I looked up through the golden autumn leaves against the deep blue sky. These colour combinations at this time of year feel to me like the promise of the warmth of summer from a world that is stepping into winter. It took me out of my worries and troubles and brought me firmly into the present moment. I was reminded once again that being present and out of my head is such a wonderful place to be. There is so much magic in this space, simple but powerful magic. I began to feel deeply grateful for the little thought that hinted at sitting down.  As I began to feel grateful I became aware of how gratitude works. I just love how following one innocent little thought can lead to such deep insights :) 

As I explained earlier I have had a lot on my mind and most of my worrying was due to a lack of movement in abundance flowing into my life. I believe that everything in life is energy and for energy and abundance to flow to me it helps for me to be open to receiving it. I have generally been someone who is not that great at receiving things; compliments, money, gifts etc. It tends to make me feel guilty. I have known for a long time that I am not that good at receiving but I never knew how to change this and become good at receiving. It is one thing to know what you are doing wrong but a completely different matter to know how to resolve it. 

As I continued on my run after leaving the oak tree I felt so much more connected and grateful. It was whilst feeling this immense gratitude that it came to me that gratitude is the key to receiving! When we are in a state of gratitude our heart is open, allowing the flow of universal energy to flow through us and our experience of life. With an open grateful heart all the abundance in the world can flow towards us and our experience of life. 

You might have already realised this but for me this was one of those huge Ah Ha! moments. Now I know how to receive the abundance of life;

• Make time to be present in the now 
• Acknowledged all the wonder around me 
• Let myself experience gratitude and open up my heart 

With so much love and gratitude Britt

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Fear…… the feeling of panic and nausea, your heart racing out of control, hot sweaty hands and formless words. 
Fear can overtake you at the most inconvenient of times, and it is something that you most likely avoid if at all possible. Yet when was the last time you felt truly alive, the sensation of your body tingling with a sense of new found power and accomplishment? Just think and find it before continuing. 
I would imagine that it was right after you did something that you found frightening something that was outside your comfort zone!?   
Life just would not be worth living if it wasn’t for a good dose of fear. Think about any novel you have read or movie that you have watched. If it doesn’t have some sort of fear inducing scene one where you want to know what happens would you read or watch it? Of course it is a lot easier to experience the fear of lost love, rejection, failure, death, etc. through a book or movie than it is to live through it and if it gets too much there is always the option to switch off or close the book, yet it is in conquering the feeling of fear that we get to feel truly alive and free. Would you not agree that fear traps you and limits your life?
Now for the science: Fear is actually just another emotion. It is linked to the reptilian part of the brain which triggered activates your flight fight and freeze mechanisms. This means that fear feels incredibly real due to the physical sensations that accompany it. Fear is a very important mechanism to ensure we don’t kill ourselves. If we didn’t fear big scary animals our species would have died out a very long time ago. The challenge is that in our modern society we have learnt so many new fears that we can find ourselves trapped in a life that is blocked by fears we have created. As I mentioned in my first blog our unconscious mind develops programs to keep us physically safe and it uses emotion to write these programs. So if you once got a fright when someone screamed because there was a spider (or you saw a scary spider movie) you would be telling your unconscious mind that spiders are scary it had better quickly write a program to protect you from spiders. After this each time you see a spider your unconscious mind would trigger your reptilian brain and your fight flight and freeze mechanisms will be activated, and when you respond in a fearful way you are strengthening the program and confirming it and so it goes on.  I mentioned that we learn most of our fears. 
When we are born we only have 2 fears:

• Fear of falling 
• Fear of loud noises

The rest we create. Picture a baby learning to walk can you imagine what would happen if it was scared of failure? It would crawl around forever fearing that if it tried to walk it might fail so never trying. Well thankfully babies don’t know the fear of failure so they don’t mind falling down a few times!!  If you weren’t so afraid of failure what would you try and fail at a few times just to you could enjoy doing it for the rest of your life?
It is important for us to realise what fears are real and which ones are in our way. A fear of snakes serves you if you live where there are poisonous snakes yet a fear of rejection will most likely stand in the way of you having fulfilling relationships.  
Our top fears are sometimes things we are not even aware we are afraid of. These are ones that have come out again and again with people I have worked with and they can translate into a fear of heights, public speaking etc. In no particular order:

1. Failure
2. Being alone or lonely 
3. Rejected 
4. Worthless/useless
5. Being vulnerable 
6. Death 
7. Pain 
8. Loss
9. Humiliated 
10. Disempowered

The scary part of this is that we create what we fear. Let me give you an example. One of my greatest fears is of being worthless. So when I first started using Face Book or even writing these blogs I was almost paralysed by the thoughts of what have I got to say that is important. Why would anyone want to read what I have to say? Who am I to be saying anything? Now here is the freaky part. If I had listened to my fears and not ever written or spoken about any of these things that I know then wouldn’t I have been being worthless?? The same is true of failure. You are so scared that you might fail so you never try and guess what you have just experienced the greatest failure of all, as you have failed before you even started. I have done this with numerous clients and every time they are creating the very thing that they fear the most. 
The way to get past this is by following these steps and using courage. 

1. Acknowledge what it is that you are afraid of. I would like to do _______________ but _____________. That but is a very good indication that you have a fear. 
2. Ask yourself what would your life be like if you listened to your fear? For me that would have meant that I would not have been able to grow my business and share what I love with others. How would this have affected my life? I would have had to give up my company and ended up working in a job that I had no interest in, earning just enough to get by and no more, I would have had to give up on all of my dreams of traveling with my kids in fact I would have had to give up on life. (The more dramatic you can make it the better, and it does have to be realistic to you) 
3. What would your life be like if you conquered this fear? So for me again what would my life be like if I conquered the fear of being worthless, I would be free to share what I have learnt, I would be able to trust what I know and my beliefs, people might value what I have to offer. My life would be open to all sorts of opportunities and to me this looks very exciting!! 
4. What actions would you take if you did not have this fear? And then list them 
   1. ________________________________________________________
   2. ________________________________________________________
   3. _______________________________________________________
   4. _______________________________________________________
5. To commit to taking these actions and give yourself a time line. 

You cannot be courageous if you do not feel fearful. So it is your choice to remain trapped or to be courageous and face your fears.  
I have also realised that freedom is on the other side of fear. So it is only by passing through your greatest fears that you will finally find your greatest freedom. My greatest fear is of falling yet my greatest dream is to be able to fly. To achieve my dream I need to conquer my fear. Incidentally flying symbolises freedom for me. I recently made my first step in this direction by doing a gorge jump at Victoria Falls with Tristen my eldest son. I don’t know how I managed to get my feet to move to the end of the very gang plank looking jumping platform yet I was determined. Luckily for me the rope had quite a bit of tension so once I was on the end I didn’t really have much choice but to go. My whole body ceased up as I fell and when the rope caught I was so incredibly glad we had done it. It also formed an amazing bond between Tristen and me as well and giving me huge confidence in other areas of my life. I mean what are a few phone calls when you have jumped off a cliff???? Apparently Tristen wants to do a parachute jump for his birthday and he wants me to do it with him so I guess that will be the next step!!!
What I haven’t mentioned and what we will look at another day is that what frightens us more than the negative things are the positive things like success, true love, being truly powerful or being great.  
Good luck and just remember to challenge yourself otherwise you might as well curl up and give up.


Love you lots 


BrittTanya